No no no........I don't know anyone who goes in for that kind of thing. Honest. Would I lie to you?

It was just - I was surfing the net in my idle moments today and came across a site devoted to retro kids' TV. As a child I loathed Andy Pandy; that silly hat and even sillier stripey jumpsuit, not to mention the narrator's toffee vowel sounds and daft laugh - a-huh! a-huh-huh-huh!

But I thought I'd have a look - to see if it was as dire as I remembered.

There was a clip, so I clicked the link to find Andy (or Endy as the narrator pronounced it), disporting himself on a swing. At the very end, our heroine the narrator said: "Endy loves swinging!"

I spat my mouthful of coffee all over the monitor. The keyboard began making strange bleeping noises, probably because my head was resting on it.

So that's what he got up to in that basket with Looby Loo and Teddy.......